I’m singing you the ballad of a scholar based at Queens;

A SHINING EXAMPLE

To the tune of the Battle Hymn of the Republic (‘Glory, Glory, Hallelujah’)

 

 

I’m singing you the glories of a scholar based at Queen’s,

Who has worked now in group theory since he was in his late teens,

Both his folks were mathematicians so it must be in the genes;

His head goes shining on!

 

Galois! Galois! Jordan! Burnside!

Cauchy! Higman–Neumann–Neumann!

Galois! Galois! Jordan! Burnside!

His head goes shining on!

 

On his antiquated cycle Peter races here and there,

Cracking geometric problems that caused Euclid to despair,

Heedless of the noise and traffic and the wind through both his hairs,

For his head goes shining on!

 

Galois! Galois! Jordan! Burnside!

Cauchy! Higman–Neumann–Neumann!

Galois! Galois! Jordan! Burnside!

His head goes shining on!

 

He can sit through countless seminars and never once look bored,

He consumes the finest vintages the SCR has stored,

And he serves the strongest café noir that money can afford,

His head goes shining on!

 

Galois! Galois! Jordan! Burnside!

Cauchy! Higman–Neumann–Neumann!

Galois! Galois! Jordan! Burnside!

His head goes shining on!

 

All you younger folk who see him here should Peter’s lesson heed:

Though he’s made it now to sixty there’s no sign he’ll go to seed,

For it’s when a man is o’er the hill he starts to pick up speed!

And his head goes shining on!

 

Galois! Galois! Jordan! Burnside!

Cauchy! Higman–Neumann–Neumann!

Galois! Galois! Jordan! Burnside!

His head goes shining on!

 

Now we’re gathered all to praise him as he hits the big six-O,

He is long in tooth but young at heart, as we his friends well know!

So let’s drink a toast to honour him and say before we go:

May his head go shining on!

 

Galois! Galois! Jordan! Burnside!

Cauchy! Higman-Neumann-Neumann!

Galois! Galois! Jordan! Burnside!

His head goes shining on!

 

(Anon. Discovered by Bill and Julia Tompson in the archives of The Queen’s College, Oxford.)

 

 

 

 

ODE TO GROUP THEORY

To the tune of ‘Mud, Mud, Glorious Mud’

 

 

A Queen’s math’ma-ti-ci-an was standing one day

On the banks of the cool river Thames;

He proved a few the-o-rems and sauntered away

To a dance club to party with friends.

 

And there on the dance floor a vision he saw –

A fair Somervillian maid.

The wine made him bold and

Her hand he took hold and

He sang her this sweet serenade:

 

Groups! Groups! Glorious groups!

Subsets and cosets and cycles and loops!

So boldly conjecture

In every new lecture,

Developing further the theory of groups!

 

The fair math’ma-ti-ci-enne he worked hard to win,

Giving proofs of devotion profound.

She could not refute them so she gladly gave in,

For his reasoning clearly was sound.

 

And therefore one summer they tied up a knot

That remains tightly tied to this day.

In good Queen’s tradition

Our young math’ma-ti-cians

To all of their students would say:

 

Groups! Groups! Glorious groups!

Subsets and cosets and cycles and loops!

So boldly conjecture

In every new lecture,

Developing further the theory of groups!

 

That young man has aged a bit, we find now that he’s

Married, sixty, and father of three –

Not counting the growing group of maths PhDs

In his large algebraic fam’ly.

 

He turns out new doctors like nobody else –

‘Supervisor’ is his middle name:

Now young mathematicians

Seek tenured positions

Inspired by his ringing refrain:

 

Groups! Groups! Glorious groups!

Subsets and cosets and cycles and loops!

So boldly conjecture

In every new lecture,

Developing further the theory of groups!

 

 

(Anon. Discovered by Bill and Julia Tompson in the archives of The Queen’s College, Oxford.)